Coburn Moves Up
by DanieXJ
Summary: #18 in my Holidays Series. A plan of sorts is hatched.
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Coburn Moves Up

**Series:** #18 in Holidays Series

**Spoilers:** 3.16 of Bad Girls

**Disclaimer:** Don't own most of the characters, ER or otherwise.

* * *

"You're sixpence short of a shilling, Coburn is the new Chief of Staff?"

"No, Nik, I just heard 'em upstairs. Janet's gonna be the next Chief of Staff."

Nikki passed a full pitcher of beer to one of the servers. "I reckon your red head got that arranged."

"Kerry in no way is mine, but, you're most like ri..." Helen trailed off and blinked, "Bloody... and they're..."

Helen's eyes barely blinked as she watched Nikki's former roommate at County lock lips with someone who definitely wasn't Kerry.

Nikki made an ooh sound and Helen glanced over to see the County party filing down the stairs and towards the door. Kerry paused at the bar. "How are you doing Nikki?"

Nikki somehow managed to peel her eyes away from the train wreck in the back of the room, "Oh?"

"Headaches?"

"Other than my favorite one?

Helen gave Nikki's arm a hard squeeze and then another. Nikki looked down, "Love?" She followed Helen's eyes, "Ah..."

Both women grimaced as Kerry turned, the one thing they hadn't wanted her to do, coming face to face with Kim and the unknown blonde woman. Kerry didn't even look at Kim, but could have killed the other woman with her stare. "Christy."

"Look, Kerry..."

Kerry ignored Kim, instead she caught Abby's arm as the younger woman went by. "You have a second?" Abby shrugged, glancing warily at Kim. Kerry planted a pleasant look on her face as she turned to Nikki and Helen. "Thank you for the use of your event room." A small smirk that just barely touched Kerry's lips appeared, "It... pushed some people's buttons just the right way."

Helen nodded, "Anytime... or, perhaps never again..."

Kerry's eyes twinkled though her mouth stayed in a frown. "Goodnight." She turned and walked by Kim without looking at the tall blonde. She came so close that it almost seemed as if the two women had touched.

Kim stared at Kerry and Abby's back until the door closed. "I should..."

Christy groaned, "What, chase after her like a wounded puppy dog? A neutered bitch? Kim, she'll live, she's a big girl. You don't even remember her, what's the big deal. It must not have been too great if that's the case right?"

Kim slumped down at the bar, "Damnit, damnit..." She put her head in her hand as the bartender approached her.

Helen gave Nikki's arm a pull, "I can see the gears turnin', so, c'mon Prefect, let's let the women we pay to tend bar, tend it."

* * *

"Are you sure Kerry?"

Kerry zipped up her suitcase. "I'm sure Charles."

"You won't tell me why?"

Kerry shrugged and shook her head, "Kim needs her space, this is her home, not mine. Henry will love seein' Joey every day."

"But e'll 'ate you..."

Kerry didn't move or look up as Kim stumbled into the bedroom. "I'm his mother. Wouldn't be the first time, won't be the last. You're drunk."

Charles took a hold of Kim's shoulder, "I'll make you a cup of..."

Kim shook off her father's hands, "No, go way Da... da... da..." She giggled. A sound that was worrying to both Kim and Charles. Kim never giggled, and for that matter, she never really got out of control drunk like she was.

"Kim..."

Kerry spoke up, "It's okay Charles."

Charles shrugged and left Kim and Kerry alone. He didn't go far though, standing just outside the room. Rose approached Charles and frowned as he put a finger to his lips and pointed at the still slightly open door.

"You're leavin'..." Kerry nodded silently, "Why?"

Kerry shook her head and went over to the dresser, mostly to put more distance between them. "You need time, obviously." Kerry looked Kim up and down.

Kim rubbed at her face, as if trying to physically get her memories back that way. "I can... can't remember..."

"I kno..."

Kim was over to Kerry's side with her right hand, the one not in the sling, on the red head's arm before Kerry could blink, "NO... I know that you like Grace Jones, you had a cru-cru-crutchy, Henry's mother's name is Sa... was Sandy..." She paused, "I know all, but I can't..."

With her right hand she yanked Kerry's hand to where her heart was trying to beat itself out of the blonde's chest. She watched as Kerry swallowed and set her jaw. After a moment the blonde woman let Kerry's hand go and they stood silent for a while again.

"I don't remember what you just felt. Henry look... looks at me like I'm God, I don't deserve that, I don't..." Kim made a face, "I don't, he's cute, he's smart, but why would..."

They stood an arm length apart for a long time more before Kerry nodded. "You need to remember who Kim Legaspi is, maybe then..." Kerry trailed off as she shook her head, "You have to know you first, if you... knew yourself you'd say that too..." Kerry gestured towards the door, "Please, leave me alone to go. I'm... I'm not going away, just, across town."

Kim started to, but turned at the door, "I-I'm sorry."

Kerry didn't blink as she answered, "You don't have to apologize, you can't remember."

"No.. That notwithstanding... 'm sorry." She turned and left. Kerry stood perfectly still for a bit and put her own hand over her heart.

* * *

"We should have a Halloween Night..."

Helen frowned, "Are you hatching a plan Nikki?"

"Me? Why ever would I do that darling?"

Helen smiled, "They're two very headstrong women, it could backfire."

"I'll see if I can convince the good ER doc to come..."

"Oh..." Helen draped her arms over Nikki's shoulders and rested her head on the right one. "You fancy the red head then?"

Nikki laughed, "'Course not love."

"Her... stern attitude perhaps reminds you of someone?"

"You can wrangle the tall leggy one then."

Helen bumped the back of Nikki's chair and Nikki laughed. "What, she's a Psychiatrist right. You like her type don't ya?"

Helen practically growled 'Nicola' out of the side of her mouth, but Nikki just kept laughing.


	2. Chapter 2

"He still mad at you?"

Kerry looked over at Henry, and nodded, "On the one hand, he gets some of it, but on the other hand, he's four and wants his playmate back."

"Do you think that she'll get all her marbles back?"

Kerry took a gulp of coffee, "You know as well as I do."

Abby put a hand on Kerry's shoulder, "I didn't mean it that way, what does your heart say?"

"My heart's generally not a good thing to go by."

"You..." Abby shook her head, "I've seen the way she looks at you. Before I mean, the way she looked at you, that can't go away because she got a bump on the head."

Kerry just shook her head and drank more coffee.

"Aren't you going to fight for her?"

"Like you did for Luka."

Abby shook her head, "That was different, we're too different. We have Joe in common, and our professions, and at one point maybe there was even some love, but we were together because it was the easy choice, the path of least resistance."

Kerry hid a smirk, "I heard Carter call..."

Abby groaned, "See, now, that was the opposite, just sex, horribly awesome, mind-blowing..."

"Abby..."

Abby met Kerry's eyes, "What?"

Kerry shook her head, "I lived with the man, I don't need that image."

Abby tilted her head to one side, "How about me?"

Kerry put her free hand to her forehead, "Please tell me you're not asking me what I think you're asking me..."

"Well?"

Kerry did more of the shaking of her head, "You're a friend Abby, I've enjoyed watching you grow into quite a fine woman." Abby raised her eyebrows, "Abby..."

She let a sigh out, "It's okay..."

Kerry rolled her eyes, "Of course Abby, but, you're straight, and I love Kim... I think."

"So, fight for her."

Kerry shook her head.

Abby bumped Kerry's hip, "Woo her... you've said last time it was just a... mutual attraction thing, not much wooing going on. Then Sandy, and Courtney, they were both the woo-er to your woo-ee, so, woo her. Make her remember. Go out on a fumbling first date. Kiss her on her parent's doorstep."

Kerry paused, but after a moment shook her head, "It's not really my... strong suit."

Abby gave Kerry a smirk, "Then you can practice on her."

"What if..."

"...she doesn't feel that way for you anymore..." The smirk didn't leave Abby's lips, "You always have me to fall back on..."

"Abigail Wyczenski Lockart..."

Abby chuckled.

* * *

"Excuse me..."

Kerry looked up, "Yes Mr. Johnson."

"Wally, please... we got off on the wrong foot." He ran a hand through what there was of his hair.

"Wallace, is there something else I can do for you?"

Wallace glanced through the glass to Chairs, "It seems as though the ER gets more than its share of nutters." Kerry didn't disagree with Wallace's statement, "If you ever need a hand... I'm at your service."

Kerry stared at Wallace for a moment before nodding, "Thank you. But..."

"Ah, back to work. It has been a pleasure."

Kerry picked up a chart and paused as a Detective infringed on her personal space. "Detective, what can I do for you?"

"It's about the fire."

* * *

Kerry walked into the suture room and stopped. She shook her head and then tilted it to one side. Lying on the bed, her eyes closed was her angel. The blonde hair splayed out on the pillow like the rays of the sun, even reclined in a hospital bed, her left arm in a sling resting against her chest, there was a spark of something that radiated from Kim, memory or no memory.

She took a step back and knocked on the door frame. Kim opened her eyes and winced. Kerry stepped into the room and closed the door behind her. "If you'd like, I'll get someone else."

"No..." Kim held up her right arm, there was a small but deep cut on it. "You're probably the best sew-er this place's got right?"

Kerry pulled over a stool and tray full of implements, "How'd you do it?"

"Unfamiliar kitchen, one hand. Not that any kitchen would be familiar at this point."

Kerry nodded, "It shouldn't take many stitches. Have you remembered anything else?"

"Three names. Merle, Earl, and Pearl."

She wasn't expecting it, and Kim almost jumped when a laugh came from Kerry. "Ah, those were your clown dolls. Scary things. Henry made Pearl for you, to keep Best Friends Forever Merle and Earl company."

Kim winced and then relaxed, "I like clowns?"

"You were petrified of them as a child, but instead of just letting yourself be afraid, in an early bout of Psychiatry you started asking for clowns for your birthday, for Christmas." Kerry told herself she was just distracting Kim from what she was doing. "When you were five you gave your parents a helluva scare. They thought you ran away from home. Instead, you'd spent the afternoon scared out of your mind in the front row of the circus."

Kim chuckled, "Seriously?"

Kerry smiled a bit, "Yes. How's your head doing?"

"What?"

Kerry gently tapped Kim's left temple, "Last night? You were drunker than a skunk."

Kim shifted her position a little, "Not by the end. I'm sorry..."

Kerry stood, "You're not, you..."

Kim moved so she was between Kerry and the door, "I... I remembered Christy, and what we had, and that I was, am, the feeling." Kim trailed off, "I remembered that I'm gay. I don't know, it was stupid to act on it, to do anything with Christy."

"I don't need to. I should go... other patients..."

Kim put a hand on Kerry's arm, "Are you okay?"

Kerry patted Kim's arm. "I'm fine, just busy..." With that she side stepped Kim and left the suture room. Kim watched at the door as Kerry strode down the hall and disappeared from view.

* * *

"Abigail?"

Abigail looked over, "New security guard, right?"

"Wally."

"Did we call you down here Wally?"

Wallace flashed what was obviously supposed to be a dazzling smile. It only turned out to be mildly creepy. "Just keepin' my eye on things."

Abby raised here eyebrows, "And what did we do for you to deserve this treatment?"

Wallace glanced around, his gaze stopping now and then on a patient, nurse, or Doctor. "It seems, nice, down here..."

Abby rolled her eyes, obviously the man was cuckoo. "Well, that'll wear off. If you'll excuse me."

Wallace inclined his head and strolled away, hands in his pockets, looking as if he owned the place.

* * *

Kim was back at Larkhall, Nikki and Helen's bar. It was mostly empty, thanks to the hour. She squinted at the woman behind the bar. "I recognize you..." She wasn't quite sure if her statement was true.

The woman laughed, "Helen Stewart. I'm an owner, and I don't believe we've met formally Doctor Legaspi. What can I get for ya?"

"Something very, very, very non-alcoholic."

Helen thought, "How about my Nik's cure for your hangover."

"God, yes please." Kim paused, "How do you know me?"

Helen went about making the drink. Kim didn't watch too closely, since she didn't really want to know what was in it. "You and Nikki were banged up together."

Kim frowned, "Maybe it's the intense pain, but that made no sense."

Helen smiled, "Ah, you shared a room at County. You were both in a coma then."

"Kerry never said she'd met such a beautiful..."

Kim trailed off and Helen filled in the blank, "Partner..."

"Partner of a patient." Helen handed Kim the drink, "So, in a biblical or business sense Ms. Helen Stewart."

Helen gave a smile, "As close to biblical as I ever plan to get again..."

Kim's eyes twinkled, "Too bad you're taken, you're cute."

Helen resisted the urge to dump a pitcher of water over Kim's head. "Thank you."

Kim fell silent for a moment. "What do you do?"

"I'm... not definable." Helen shook her head, "From Governing Governor to..." She glanced around, "this. Not what I expected that first day I walked into HMP Larkhall."

Kim nodded her agreement, "Our lives never quite go the way we think they will. I never thought I... damn."

Helen frowned, "What is it?"

Kim blinked, "I never thought I would wind up back in Chicago."

Helen's frown was still there, "Not sure I understand."

"I have more holes than Swiss cheese in my memory, but that just came to me. Easiest memory I've recalled yet. I... I must sound stupid."

"Slightly daft..."

Kim rolled her eyes. "Why thank you."

Helen regarded Kim for a moment and changed the subject, "You fancy somethin' to do on All Hallows Eve?"

"Oh?"

Helen shook her head, "Down girl. A party, here, fancy dress, costume party for Halloween, no theme."

"I wouldn't know what to wear..."

Helen wiped a bit of wetness from the bar and stopped mid wipe. "I believe I have the perfect idea."

* * *

Kerry did a double take at who came into the doctor's lounge. "Miss Wade?"

Nikki glanced one way, then the other, "Nikki, please. Not breakin' any rules am I?"

Kerry shook her head, "Somehow I doubt if you'd stop if you were." Nikki raised her eyebrows, "But in my ER, you only break rules when I say so. Are you okay?"

Nikki took a leisurely stroll around the doctor's lounge, her hands in her pockets. "Yes, you? All limbs accounted for?"

Kerry frowned, "Fine I guess, why do I get the feeling that Helen is ambushing Kim much like this?"

A smile came to Nikki's face as she sprawled out on the couch. "There's nothin like the love of another. Helen has a thing for Psychiatrists..." Kerry had no idea where Kim was going with her train of thought. "Male, last I knew though, so... Kim, Kim doesn't have a type doesn't even have a preferred orientation, straight, bi, bi-curious, lesbian. Now you..." Nikki tilted her head to one side, "Strong, smart, compassionate, and a bit on the darker side if I was to guess."

"Oh?"

"Well, there's the young woman doc out there, your face, darker skin, and your Henry, also darker. You like darker don't ya. So, Kim puzzles me..."

Kerry's hackles were up,, "You don't know my feelings. What about you? Jailers who are unattainable."

"I attained fine thank you."

Kerry turned her back to poor more coffee. When she turned she was backed into the edge of the counter. Nikki gripped Kerry's head in her hands and met the red head's lips with her own, not letting the kiss end until she felt Kerry's knee against her stomach.

Nikki bent over coughing, "Ah..." Another cough, "Jus evenin things out darling. Kim was all over bottle blonde last night."

"Don't do it again Nikki."

Nikki crossed her arms over her chest and Kerry had to blink away the after image of Kim doing that exact motion. "You know, I get it, I really do."

"Oh?"

Nikki closed her eyes for a moment, before swallowing, "She's your hope. Your life hasn't been the best, her's has, her family, her life, her love, it's your hope that you deserve what she has." She nodded and swept her hand against her nose, "I know what that's like." She cleared her throat, "Sorry..." Kerry didn't say a word. "Hey, I'm over it right." Nikki smiled, "My dreams came true outside a bar, Chix. Yours can too, at Larkhall."

Kerry frowned, "You know, I looked up your bar's name. Interesting idea to name it after where you were..."

"Banged up. Wasn't my idea."

"What's your plan?"

Nikki tilted her head to one side, "Who's sayin' I have a plan?"

Kerry's shoulders shook in silent laughter, "If you can guess about me. You always have a plan, and yet, the best things that have happened in your life..."

"...happened when the plan went out the window." Nikki stared at the short red head for a moment and shook her head, "Fine, do ya want to hear the plan then?"

"Lay it on me. As long as it's nothing illegal."

Nikki got an amused look on her face, "Consider who you're talkin' to darling..."

* * *

Fin ~ April 13th, 2008


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